Old Firm legends Charlie Miller and Simon Donnelly and broadcasting giants Rob Maclean and David Tanner bring full match commentary live from the commentary box at every performance.  

The commentators are joined by TikTok star Hawaii Fivo, lending his vocal talents to bring the other prisoners to life with unforgettable character voices.  

Force adversaries to talk and you may achieve peace. What happens when you lock up a Celtic fan with a Rangers fan on the day of the big match?  Fireworks! That’s what! 

Des Dillon delights, entertains and educates on the religious origins of Celtic-Ranger conflict. Beneath its amusement, this award-winning play explores bigotry and ethnic identity on both a microcosmic and macrocosmic scale. Through the lens of the two characters locked in a prison cell, we witness the generational repercussions of Catholic and Protestant strife. 

The play functions as a broader allegory, addressing bigotry-motivated hate across multiple communities. It extends beyond the immediate conflict, including references to the UK immigration crisis and tensions in Palestine, making it a powerful commentary on the universal nature of prejudice and division. 

“Singin' I'm No A Billy, He's a Tim scores big with a pitch-perfect performance, dribbling between humour and social commentary with finesse.” Mary Baillie 

This is football. This is theatre. This is Billy & Tim like you’ve never seen—or heard—it before.

Along the way, he shines a light on the realities of growing up in care, the resilience that carried him through, and the strength found in storytelling and second chances.

It’s Not Where You Start… is more than a story of survival — it’s a testament to grit, growth, and the transformative power of love, laughter, and compassion.

“Highly amusing and incredibly inspirational.”

— Paul Kelbie, Discover Scotland Magazine